Give the People What They Want...(even when the people are delusional)

Taking a break from imaginary movie castings to give you peeps what you want. And, according to all the emails, you people want more MWFHS...I am seriously surprised. You all must be gluttons for punishment. Or maybe it makes you feel better to revel in my misery. Who the hell knows? Or, perhaps, it's like a guy told me recently, "Girls don't want a nice guy. They want a jerk...a good looking jerk...someone who will send mix signals that they can then obsess over and call their girlfriends at 2 a.m. and pick over every little thing the asshole said and didn't say...girls say they want the nice, sweet, sensitive guy, but they don't...they want the ass who will keep things stirred up in all kinds of drama." Damn, he was harsh, no? Is he right, though? Is that what most women want? Do we need drama to stay interested? Lordy, Lordy, I hope not. I don't think it's true. Is it?

Anyway, for your reading pleasure, here are a few more tidbits about MWFHS.

1. Months ago, he and his live-in girlfriend decided to build a house. They went with one of those cookie-cutter planned neighborhoods. They had only 5 or 6 plans from which to choose. MWFHS emailed me all the plans, saying he and his GF (I call her WideFace - seriously, her face is W-I-D-E) couldn't decide. I looked at the plans, chose the ugliest one, and told him I loved it. I was freakin' thrilled when he posted the plans on facebook. Yep, there it was, the ugly house I had picked. It is wide...and plain...and flat...like his GF's face.

2. He is, as we speak, on vacation...with WideFace, of course. They are in an absolutely beautiful location. Though I would NEVAH tell him this - I am a little jealous because I am stuck in Stupidly Small Town folding mah damn laundry and eating Domino's pizza. Anyway, he sent a text when he got off the plane. He sent a picture of the resort. He sent a picture of their room. He sent a picture of the pool. He sent several pictures of himself. He has been sneaking off to the bathroom to text me and call me. By now WideFace must surely think he has the runs or a bladder infection.

Here are a few texts from the last few days:

That morning:
MWFHS: "I'm at the pool. It's beautiful here...only thing that would make it better is you lying right here beside me."
Me: "Where's the GF?"
MWFHS: "Beside me."

That afternoon:
MWFHS: "So, how's the new guy?"
Me: "Pretty good; things are groovy."
MWFHS: "I didn't need to hear that."
Me: "Why the hell did you ask?"

That night:
MWFHS: "Did you get my pic? I'm all dressed up for dinner. You know I look sexy."
Me: "I suppose you looked okay."
MWFHS: "Whatever. You like it."
Me: "I don't hate it."
MWFHS: "I fucking hate this new guy."
Me: "What's he have to do with it?"
MWFHS: "Everything. And you know it. See ya."

Later that night (technically early that morning):
MWFHS: "Sorry if I was an ass."
Me: "You're always an ass. That's how I've always described you - a lovable ass."
MWFHS: "You said lovable."
Me: "Don't get carried away. I also said ass."
MWFHS: "I heard what I wanted to hear...and I'm happy. Night baby...my sweet Sunshine."
Me: "Goodnight...ass."

Love to the peeps!
Annabelly